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What Men Can Do

10 Things Men Can Do To Prevent Violence Against Women

  1. OPEN YOUR MIND on the myths and realities of rape.  Learn as much as you can about why people rape, why many women don't report and why we must all work together to prevent rape.

  2. HAVE THE COURAGE TO LOOK INWARD.  Question your own attitudes.  Don't be defensive when something you do or say ends up hurting someone else.  Try hard to understand how your own attitudes and actions might inadvertently  perpetuate sexism and violence and work hard toward changing them.

  3. SPEAK UP.  If a brother, friend, classmate, or teammate is abusing his  female partner or is disrespectful to girls and women in general--don't look the other way.  If you feel comfortable doing so, try to talk to him about it.  Urge him to seek help. Or if you don't know what to do, consult a friend, a parent, a professor, or counselor.  DON'T REMAIN SILENT.

  4. BE AN ALLY. Participate in community efforts to stop rape. Be an ally to women who are working to end all forms of gender violence. Support the work of campus-based women's centers. Contact your local rape crisis center and offer your support or donation. Become a volunteer. Attend "Take Back the Night" rallies and other public events. Raise money for community-based rape crisis centers and battered women's shelters. If you belong to a team or fraternity, or another student group, organize a fundraiser.

  5. COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR PARTNER ABOUT SEX. By using effective communication – stating your desires clearly, listening to your partner and asking when the situation is unclear – men can make sex safer for themselves and others.

  6. TALK WITH WOMEN … about how the threat of rape affects their daily lives. Ask women what you can do to help. If you suspect that a woman close to you is being abused or has been sexually assaulted, gently ask if you can help.

  7. EDUCATE YOURSELF.  Attend programs, take courses, watch films, and read articles and books about multicultural masculinities, gender inequality, and the root causes of gender violence.  Educate yourself and others about how larger social forces affect the conflicts between individual men and women.

  8. TEACH EARLY, TEACH OFTEN. Mentor and teach young boys about how to be men in ways that don't involve degrading or abusing girls and women. Volunteer to work with gender violence prevention programs, including anti-sexist men's programs. Lead by example.

  9. DON'T FUND SEXISM.  Refuse to purchase any magazine, rent any video, subscribe to any Web site, or buy any music that portrays girls or women in a sexually degrading or abusive manner. Protest sexism in the media.

  10. RECOGNIZE AND SPEAK OUT against other forms of oppression. For example, discrimination and violence against lesbians and gays have direct links to sexism (e.g. the sexual orientation of men who speak out against sexism is often questioned, a conscious or unconscious strategy intended to silence them. This is a key reason few men do so).